Saturday, January 23, 2010

'Twas the Month After Christmas

I found this on, and just had to share!

'Twas the month after Christmas and all through the house
Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.
The cookies I'd nibbled, the eggnog I'd tasted
At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.

When I got on the scales there arose such a number
When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber) -
I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared.

The fudge and the fruit cake,
the bread and the cheese
And the way I'd never said, "No thank you please."

As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt-
I said to myself, as only I can, "You can't spend all winter disguised as a man!"

So away with the last of the sour cream dip,
Get rid of the fruit cake,
every cracker and chip,
Till all the additional ounces have vanished,
I won't have a cookie - not even a lick,
I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick.

I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie;
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore -
But isn't that what January is for?

Unable to giggle, no longer a riot
Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!


Thursday, January 7, 2010

Helpful Household Tips For New Year's Cleaning

To shine your appliances, rub them with rubbing alcohol.

To remove a bathtub ring, let warm water sit in the tub with vinegar (approx. 1 cup) in it. Wipe away with a damp sponge.

Either a baking soda paste or rubbing alcohol will remove permanent marker and crayon marks on walls/floors. Test a spot first to make sure it works with your finish!

Vinegar water will counteract pet urine smells.

If you sprinkle your carpets with baking soda prior to vacuuming, it will draw out odors.

Sprinkle baking soda in kitty litter pans after filling with fresh litter to prevent your stinky kitty from stinking up the whole house when she's done.

WD40 prevents soap scum from sticking to your shower doors. Wipe a thin film over the doors after cleaning.